the
same
feeling
always
comes
back
again.
i
go
in
circles
and
end
up
right
back
where
i
started
everytime.
i
thought
seeing
a
therapist
would
help
but
in
all
reality
i
f@cking
hate
it.
just
the
thought
of
going
and
talking
makes
me
sick
to
my
stomach
because
theres
no
way
i
can
ever
say
all
the
things
i
want
to
say.
im
always
going
to
be
stuck
in
this
constant
battle
with
myself.
i
dont
picture
myself
living
my
life
to
its
fullest-ever.
or
ever
being
happy.
i
was
meant
to
live
a
life
of
endless
pain,
a
hopeless
journey
to
no
where,
alone.
i
will
never
have
anyone
or
anything.
and
whos
to
say
if
i
did
if
i
would
be
happy.
i
dont
think
i
will
ever
find
out.
after
now
really
knowing
that
not
even
therapy
or
meds
can
save
me
what
is
left
for
me
to
hold
on
to?
nothing.
i
thought
things
would
be
different.
my
body
is
sick
and
i
am
sick.
my
mind
feels
sick.
if
i
don't
kill
myself,surely
my
body
will
just
deteriorate
on
its
own.
i
already
feel
like
it
has
created
a
disease.and
before
i
know
it..i'll
be
dead,not
even
knowing
what
was
coming.
yet
all
along
fearing
it.
i
was
never
meant
to
live
a
happy
healthy
life
ever
since
i
was
born
and
this
continuous
trying
is
too
exhausting
now.
and
different
from
all
the
other
times
before
its
not
just
me
saying
it
but
i
can
feel
my
body
shutting
down.
my
soul.everything
is
gone.
im
just
an
empty
shell
going
through
the
motions.
