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Kerrivh
"This is me..."
My URL: http://www.ocdtribe.com/Kerrivh




what to do?

Mood: Anxious
Date: Jul. 02, 2009
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Today I am feeling anxious.  Ocd is getting the better of me.  It has been several days since I have been able to sleep well.  I still have to get up early, work long hours and take care of my family, even though I am exhausted.  I feel like I am close to an emotional breakdown.  I feel like I don't have it in me to complete the work week.  I hate the dark feelings that OCD brings, deep in my chest, like I am being sufficated by darkness.  I know this time will pass, it always does, I just have to drag myself there.  i take Ambien to sleep a couple of times a week as needed in very small doses but even with that I was awake until all hours last night, plus the baby kept waking up.  Then I fall asleep just in time to have to get up for work and another day of the same odl sh*t.  Thanks for being a safe place to vent.
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VIEWING 1 - 4 OUT OF 4 COMMENTS

From: Kerrivh
July 6, 2009, 9:08 pm

 Thank you all for your comments and encouragement.  I really appreciate it.  I do feel a bit better now.  I find a great deal of self worth from being a mother and a caretaker of sorts.  I base my self worth on what I am able to accomplish for my family.  Did I make a good meal for my husband?  Are my kids  happy and healthy?  Stuff like that.  I love knowing that I can come hear and share my feelings, sort of like an open and honest diary with feed back which is cool.  Thanks again, you guys rock!
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From: cari
July 4, 2009, 11:48 am

 

Can you get any help?  At least with the physical side of life...any family members that could take some of the burden off?  I know as women we feel like we have to do everything and be Superwoman, but sometimes we do need to ask for help, and that's alright.  No one can do everything all the time, especially when dealing with an OCD flair up.  I find it liberating to ask for help from my significant other.  He doesn't always like it, but hey, we do enough for our families...they can chip in too.  We'll get burned out if we don't, and that's not good for anyone.  If no sig other, then how about older children, extended family, even a trusted friend...these are all resources that we are often afraid to ask for help from, but sometimes it is necessary and there is nothing wrong with asking for a little outside help.  Every needs this from time to time.

Also, is there any way you can take a day off?  A health day?  I used to feel guilty about doing that if I wasn't physically sick but sometimes it is necessary to get your emotional balance again and be able to successfully face your responsibilities.  Emotional/mental issues can cause just as many problems as physical if not dealt with. 

Finally I would ask if you are on any medication for your OCD...sometimes that can help take the edge off....therapy is also good but I know schedules don't always allow for that when you have to work full-time and take care of a family.  When you talk about the darkness I wonder if there is some depression going on too...I think that is often a side effect of OCD.

Well, hope some of those suggestions will help you.  You are always welcome to vent here too of course. 

Hang in there it will get better!
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From: paulahankins
July 3, 2009, 8:11 am

This is the third time I typed this response. Everything sounded like a cliche. So whenever you need to vent, look me up. If it helps any I despise the F*ck  out of my OCD. So maybe we can if anything talk about our mutual hatred. I hope you're having a better day!
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paula
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From: jul
July 2, 2009, 5:36 pm

 i hope that you feel better soon........i feel as you do alot of the time...
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