Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

my name is hayley im 26 i live in the uk a geordie lass from the north east. Had OCD since i can remember my invisible twin, sometimes we get along other times i wonder if it is illegal to kill someone nobody knows exsists. I want other ppl to allow me to love them and protect them as i truly believe this is my purpose on our little planet, however i wish my OCD would stop at that and not include the guilt i feel when i cannot always do this, I am not super human I know ppl will get hurt some will walk away of there own accord others must go where i cannot yet follow. I am not completly faultless i will also hurt the ones i love with or without intention, really i think i just need to be needed. I only ever feel happy when other ppl are happy, i can't bare to think of those alone without someone just to hold out there hand to them until they can stand on there own again. Above all I love to make ppl laugh it's a good medicine. Guess that is me then not an Angel but hoping to be a guardian til i get my wings lol.