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Alone

By: DS
Mood: Lonely
Date: Oct 11, 2013
Music: None


I won't be long tonight. I'm sorry this isn't one of my positive blogs, I truly am, but if I'm going to be honest in writng this I gotta acknowledge when it 's bad as well as when it's good....and tonight it's bad.

I've never been very lucky in love and tonight I feel more alone and low than I have in some time. Yeah, I know it'll pass. Some of my friends have already rallied and expressed the platitudes that things will look better, that I should hang in there etc. But, man, I'm tired.

I have this stuff in my head that I got stuck with without any choice due to extremely violent abuse experiences and (if the research into what causes OCD is accurate) a potential wiring issue with my brain. That ,combined with the fact that I'm not exacly a pin up, renders  me anathema with the female of the species.

I try to keep my chin up, but when everyone around me is constantly pairing up and eventually finding someone while I'm isolated and constantly end up alone and feeling unloved, it's gets hard to maintain.

I do believe tomorrow will be better and this blog isn't me giving up or even trying to contradict what I've written so far on this site. It's been a rough night of the soul and I just needed to vent.

Anyway, if you took the time to read this , I thank you. Deep breaths, right? I hope your night is going better than mine. May we all have a pleasant tomorrow filled with love and hope.

 

Peace.



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VIEWING 1 - 3 OUT OF 3 COMMENTS

From: marnella
October 12, 2013, 5:31 pm

I hope today is better for you than last night was......



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'Oz never did give nothin' to the Tin Man, that he didn't already have'
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October 11, 2013, 11:13 pm

Sorry you're feeling so blue... we've all been there from time to time (some very long times, in my case).  Hope it passes quickly for you. 



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From: jemily
October 11, 2013, 10:51 pm
yes, deep breaths. someone once said 'your life can change on a dime' and i know this to be true. i am sorry you are lonely tonight.

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The smallest step in the right direction can end up being the biggest step of your life, tip toe if you must but take the step.
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