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worry and fear
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By:
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angelwings08
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Mood:
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Bored
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Date:
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Sep 10, 2008
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Music:
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contemporary christian
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I
Have
pure
o
form
of
ocd.
This
is
very
hard
for
me.
I
was
diagnosed
about
one
year
ago
and
since
then
the
thought
of
having
a
mental
disorder
has
been
killing
me
on
the
inside.
I
constanstly
think
about
the
ocd,
i
feel
like
if
i
could
just
deal
with
the
fact
that
i
have
ocd
that
i
could
be
alot
better.
One
of
my
biggest
obsessions
is
getting
so
depressed
that
i
don't
want
to
live.
I'm
not
a
depressed
person,
i
love
going
places
and
being
with
my
family.
I
just
obsess
all
the
time
that
i
might
not
want
to
live
anymore,
these
thoughts
cause
alot
of
anxiety
so
i
know
its
just
the
ocd.
I
think
the
reason
i
live
under
this
obsession
is
because
when
i
was
16
years
old
my
little
sister
past
away.
I
tryed
to
take
my
own
life
away
by
taking
an
overdose
on
pills.
As
i
remember
this,
i
think
back
and
i
don't
think
i
was
depressed
i
think
i
might
have
been
wanting
attention.
I'm
also
scared
that
it
was
my
ocd
that
put
that
thought
in
my
head
and
i
didn't
know
how
to
react
to
it
then
because
i
was
so
young
and
didn't
know
i
had
ocd
and
just
did
it.
I
live
in
fear
of
reliving
this
situation
because
in
my
mind
then,
i
never
remember
really
wanting
to
die.
I
just
really
wish
i
could
get
this
thought
and
image
out
of
my
mind
and
move
along
in
my
life.
I
have
alot
of
fear
in
my
life.
I
fear
about
the
health
of
my
children.
i
fear
about
my
health.
i
fear
that
i
will
get
sick
.
i
fear
that
i
will
have
to
have
surgery
or
have
to
stay
in
hospital.
i
fear
that
i
will
go
crazy
one
day.
i
fear
of
losing
my
husband.
i
fear
that
my
husbands
mom
and
family
will
think
im
crazy
because
i
have
ocd.
i
fear
about
others
talking
about
me
because
i
have
ocd.
i
fear
that
my
ocd
will
worsen
in
the
future
and
i
won't
be
able
to
function
or
take
care
of
my
kids.
i
fear
when
my
kids
get
grown
and
leave
me.
i
sometimes
even
fear
to
go
home
from
work
because
i'm
afraid
of
the
thoughts
i
used
to
have
will
come
back.
i
fear
that
my
meds
will
stop
working
and
i
will
go
crazy.
i
fear
that
i
will
wake
up
in
the
middle
of
night
and
go
crazy.
I
have
alot
of
fears,
it
like
i
live
my
life
in
fear.
Until
one
year
ago
i
lived
my
life
very
normally,
i
didn't
have
anxiety
or
fear.
but
after
i
gave
birth
to
my
son
my
whole
life
changed.
It
is
so
hard
looking
back
then
and
knowing
how
much
i
have
changed,
it
really
hurts.
i
just
want
to
go
back
to
my
old
self,
but
after
a
year
of
this,
it
just
don't
feel
like
that's
ever
gonna
happen.
i
have
always
been
the
strong
person
and
now
i
feel
weak.
i
worry
too
much
about
what
people
think,
i
wish
i
could
just
except
the
fact
that
i
have
ocd
and
deal
with.
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