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dont know what to do anymore
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By:
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betho4444
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Mood:
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Lonely
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Date:
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Nov 24, 2007
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Music:
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None
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hey
everyone i
haven't
been
on
here
for
so
long.... i
just
felt
like
writing
a
blog
because
im
feeling
really
low
for
loads
of
reasons.
Basically
over
the
summer
i
went
to
this
Christian
camp
and
became
a
proper
Christian
which
helped
my
ocd
so
much
it
was
actually
unreal
at
first,
because
it
was
like
"oh
well
if
god
controls
everything
then
i
don't
need
to
do
any
ocd
stuff
in
order
to
have
a
good
day"
and
everything
seemed
great
etc.
But
then
i
started
to
get
really
depressed.
im
not
sure
what
started
it
off,
probably
the
weather,
i
guess.
But
it
got
SO
much
worse
when
i
went
on
holiday
with
my
family
and
cousin.
Firstly,
my
13
year
old
cousin
had
a
string
of
boyfriends
at
this
time,
which
literally
made
me
so
embarassed
and
upset
because
me,
being
the
eldest
of
the
family
and
nearly
17,
has
never
had
a
boyfriend.
Then
a
few
weeks
later
i
went
to
my
other
cousin's
18th
party
and
both
my
14
year
old
sister
and
my
cousin
got
pulled
by
loads
of
guys
right
in
front
of
me....
which
as
u
can
imagine
was
not
very
encouraging! And
all
this
time
i
was
having
the
piss
taken
out
of
me
by
my
non-christian
family
and
friends
for
my
beliefs.
Im
still
trying
to
be
christian,
i
mean
i
still
study
the
bible, but
my
now
shaky
faith
in
what
seemed
to
me
a
solid,
loving
God
has
caused
my
ocd
to
creep
back
into
my
life.
I
mean,
this
must
sound
absolutely
ridiculous,
because
of
course
there
are
more
things
in
life
than
boyfriends
and
what
other
people
think,
its
just
right
now
its
so
hard
to
see
a
way
out-
i
keep
on
looking
to
God
but
there
just
seems
to
be
no
answer.
I'm
not
asking
for
a
full
counselling
session
or
even
anyone
to
read
this,
but
if
there
are
any
christian
ocd-ers
out
there,
i
would
apprieciate
a
few
words
of
advice.
thanks
to
anyone
who
bothered
to
read
this,
and
i
hope
everyone
who
i
spoke
to
last
time
i
was
online
is
well
:)
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