|
Moving On
|
|
|
By:
|
Authoress37
|
|
Mood:
|
Fearful
|
|
Date:
|
Jun 05, 2012
|
|
Music:
|
Organic Machine--2 Skinnee J's
|
|
|
Waiting
for
my
shower
to
be
free.
Should
be
asleep
by
now...
eh.
I
went
to
see
my
therapist
yesterday
and
we
talked
about
my
OCD
in
length.
She
brought
up
something
I
never
noticed.
I
always
say
"I
need
to.
I
have
to."
As
though
nothing
in
my
life
is
by
my
choosing.
When
I
told
her
some
of
my
routines
and
things
I
do,
I
always
said,
"I
have
to.
It's
necessary."
See,
I'm
a
doubter
and
sinner,
and
hoarder.
I
HAVE
to
do
these
routines,
and
follow
these
rules
or
else
something
bad
will
happen
to
either
me
or
my
family.
It's
just
how
it
works.
And
I'm
convinced
this
has
been
true
my
whole
life.
Because
time
and
time
again
it
seems
to
prove
itself.
I
hoard
because
these
things
become
part
of
me
and
it's
my
job
to
take
care
of
them.
I
can't
throw
them
out
or
something
bad
will
happen.
Everything
has
an
expiration
date.
And
once
you
go
past
that,
it's
yours
forever.
But,
she
suggested
I
try
saying
"I
choose
this
because..."
Not
with
everything,
but
slowly.
When
I
catch
myself
in
a
familliar
OCD
behavior,
say,
"I
am
choosing
to
do
this
so
something
bad
won't
happen."
Just
today
alone,
I
have
done
it
several
times.
It
does
something.
I
guess
it's
making
me
re-think
why
I
do
what
I
do.
Like
in
the
back
of
my
mind
I
KNOW
nothing
bad
will
happen
if
I
throw
out
my
old
toothbrush,
but
then
I
feel
anxious.
But
slowly,
I
feel
it
shifting.
I
suggest
you
guys
try
it.
Never
know
how
it
may
work
with
you I
also
got
a
new
boss
today.
Wish
I
could
say
I
am
happy.
My
old
boss
was
the
nicest
woman
ever
and
a
really
good
boss.
I
miss
her
like
crazy.
The
new
boss
came
in
and
changed
EVERYTHING.
Moved
all
of
our
stuff.
Locked
up
our
office
supplies.
Belittled
my
co-worker
and
I,
even
though
we
have
been
there
much
longer
than
her
and
probably
know
more.
She
was
suprised
when
I
knew
as
much
as
I
did.
DUH.
She
changed
many
of
our
rules
that
worked
well
with
our
facility.
But
obviously,
I
don't
do
well
with
change.,
And
I
hope
this
problem
I
have
with
immidiate
change
doesn't
effect
my
job
that
I
love
so
much.
I
don't
want
to
butt
heads
with
her,
but
I
think
it's
inevitable.
This
was
all
so
sudden...
and
I
am
having
a
hard
time
dealing
with
it.
I
am
set
in
my
ways,
but
I
have
to
change.
This
isn't
a
choice
and
it's
one
I
wish
was.
Good
night
everyone.
|
|
