Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

i believe that everything happens for a reason, why we all have ocd, im not sure. maybe to make as stronger?
well anyway, two years ago, when i was diagnosed with ocd, my life has never been the same. i sometimes get jealous at people who don't have ocd, they don't know what its like, the never will. Going to school everyday is very hard. those cold stares say it all, 'freak, weirdo." They laugh and make unneccesary comments, which really gets on my nerves. you know how when you NEED to do something it doesn't feel good till you've done it? when people are watching me do my stuff, it feels like i'm holding it in. the relief and the 'better' feeling doesn't come. sometimes, like today, i cant sit down on my chair anymore, i just can't,it feels really bad. so i panick and stress. i want to go to the spare room in the office where i go sometime when things are bad, but i have a grumpy relief teacher who doesn't understand. i tell him i NEED TO GO. i tell him i've got ocd and so on. he says, ok, but i don't think i should let you go. he is speaking in a way suggesting that ocd is no problem. in a sense of doubt to it all. they tell me to stop turning around, looking behind me. i tell them I HAVE TO. the doubt comes back. oh yeah, right they mutter sarcastically and walk off. this is a day of my life. so many thing i HAVE TO DO when one stops the next starts...
'SOME' OF THE THINGS I HAVE TO DO.

- look behind me every few minutes. -look to each side of the room
- i have to walk a little distance fowards then the same distance backwards then the same fowards.

- close certain doors

- spin around in circles - touch,tap,push and lift things in a certain pattern until it feels right.

-open my mouth really wide, stretching it.

-say stuff in my head a couple of times in a row.

-pat my pets on the head a couple of times. -looking at things -pull lids of things (*random*)

- when im talking and someone interupts i have to say everything i said again clearly and loud.

- yell stuff at my mum, saying how aweful she is when i know she isn't - breaks my heart =(

-hug mum very hard

-stand up and tense my legs very often

- in the bathroom when the towels are hung over, each end has to be straight.

- have to open and close things in patterns, like shower curten etc.

- practically everything i do in my everyday life consists of patterns

- i have to say that i need or want something repeatedly �that i actually don't need\want (etc. i need to go to the toilet,� nah just joking) when i dont need to go,�if that makes sense. but i say all these ones in swiss

- everytime i enter or leave my bed room i have to lie ontop of my bed on my stomach and kiss the pillow.

- i always feel like some one is angry at me.

- i have to twist the doornobs a few times when im in my room

- i have to repeatedly put my nose close to something and smell it if i know it would smell disgusting. (dirty socks, towels used to dry dishes etc)

-when i am feeling very unsettled i have to hurt people like my mum.. =(

-when i have my mouth plate in my mouth, i have to clench my teeth together very har, it hurts!

- i have to look above people's heads while closing my eyes really hard with my hands to my face.

-

- i have this new one, when im standing up walking or whatever i have to freeze and not blink once while i have to say something in my head, pretty long sentence lol, and anyway while i am doing that, i need to throw away whatever im holding in my hands. literally. its annoying when im holding a phone, because i know that im not allowed to throw it... my friend says i look like i've just seen something really scarey coz my eyes go really big. then after that i have to do my walking pattern.

. ...umm, i cant think of all of them right now.. but i do them VERY OFTEN even at school so people think im REALLY weird.

TWILIGHT AND NEWMOON!!! JACOB HAHA, umm, snow, SWITZERLAND, skiing, HOLIDAYS, friends, nice, considerate, honest people. Animals. surfing but never do it anymore cause now i get panic attacks in waves.... =(

selfish people with no manners and people who are impolite, people who do bad and selfish things just so they earn a little money for themselves. when people say they're gonna kill themselves cause i get scared and don't know what i can do to change their minds. crocodiles, sharks, insects and spiders. people who have billions of dollars and don't donate a cent of it to charity.

i love most music,
a few of my favorites are; Down by Jay sean, I gotta A Feeling by Black Eyed Peas, shawty like a melody... not sure who its by...now you're gone by basshunter, hotel room service by pitbull- (if i dont listen to the words lol), fireflies by owl city, and any happy songs that make you feel like smiling and forgetting about your problems and ocd ect.

umm not much of a reader but if i find a really good book, i will practically sleep with it lol.

TWILIGHT AND NEWMOON!!!!

skiing, acting, making houses in the sims 3, HOLIDAYS and WEEKENDS, hanging with my best friends, playing my guitar , cooking, takes my mind of ocd. tennis, soccer.

Teens with OCD	Animal lovers with OCD
OCD Cure via Diet & Supplement